C.I.

The main problem about being prepared for war is the fact that war is not always present. I reached the bottom of what I need to conceive now as the imperative necessity of overcoming the reality that appears unreal at the general overview. I dared for weeks to betray all those things in which I believe just for a blind anger for knowing more than my own reality allows. I just crashed into a wall of air that must serve as example of confidence.

I see that the beginning of all my problems lies within my own area of existence; that the fear that always push me along my own challenges, also poisons my achievements. This is nothing to do with my vowed silence; but the reason that makes me hide beneath that mask.

I can't predict how this will affect the course of the facts from now on. And maybe it's the time for me to realize that THIS is not a priority.

I just hope whatever will be wrotten about our time; can be read with an smile someday.

Music by: Muse [Invincible]

Das nächste schritt

After all every mind has it's own storms and the way to deal with them. Even in most of the cases this so called storm is no more than a glimpse of air. I'm really surprised because I just remembered how does it feel not to expect even the minimal sample of care and get to the conclusion that no matter how words can shape a turf ending, we all carry masks that strenghten our posture at the very moment of confrontation.

Even I know exactly whom I learned this from, a plain memory is just the tribute I will offer this time.

Simple is always better; and this may have a lot of different meanings. I know now that I'm in debt with myself for some other aspects; and curiously; I'm doing some things that come out of my mind just because IT is like that.

I almost forgot; just as I like; I have an inusited chance to dig into my own fears. By this point; I can't answer myself if I shall cross that barrier.

Music by: Velvet Revolver [Slither]

Laufen

Sometimes the barrier that bring us down everytime is no more than the blindfold that keeps standing in front of our eyes. The mistakes seen from stranger's eyes can be easy to see but hard to stand against; and I'm in the position I've never liked to be. It's true that I took the responsability of my own acts, and that has never been different. I only would have liked this to happen more clearly, yes, I know, I would have...

I started therapy for both body and soul; even I still haven't got any significant advance or at least a glimpse that can ensure success. By this point I only realize that this effort brings a sickness hard to deal with; and this time it would be on my own.

Music by: The Ting Tings [Great DJ]